Why try any more? All you do is kicked in the head, so why not just enjoy life?

So last night prepping for Tuesday's Coast to Coast FM show, I was teasing my SheWolf, about getting laid(that don't happen, too many risks and no one to poke fun at any how). So there I was chatting or texting, does anyone every really talk on the phone any more? So I thought, why the hell am I driving myself into the grave and missing living for a podunk town that don't care, a bunch of other people who don't care, and fighting for a nation that don't care? I mean think of it this way; I see all too many posts on my FB newsfeed, about people saying lets fight for southern liberty and all, and yet, who ever digs into their pockets to fund that change? I have barked I can't count how many times that if the bastards would ever take the same amount of money they'd spend going out for a night at the bar, and send it to us in the Knytes we could put our efforts into overdrive. Yet for nearly 8 years I have yet to go to my mailbox to find even 1 envelope addressed to the Knytes, with a note here's money for southern liberty. Not once. It's always the Knytes doing ALL the heavy lifting. And funding, from a rapidly getting more shallow pond. 
Then I get assholes like Beaver Dick and Wyosleuth and a few other hecklers that are pissing at me, and I thought, why should I keep killing myself. Finish up LexiBelle, send LiL Wolf to Nate, park LexiBelle by the house here, and take the money I have left after rent cable and utilities, and just go party like hell, have sex with any and all that will let me, stay in places that are at least 10 to 30 degrees warmer, than here in Etown, Wyoming, and just have fun and just be frigging lazy. Go to Hollywood, go to DC, take a few trips on the bus to sunny Dixieland, don't matter. Why should I even try? Why should I even care any more. The Club's well is drying up, there's no big corporate support any more. So why should I bust my ass? I'm 57 years old, done everything at least once sometimes twice, been a few places, but I still live alone. My girl Shelly tried to help raise money to save the shop, and all , but to no avail. So why ? Just close down, go through the motions of going towing, do my radio gig, but the rest, why? I'm just done. 
I damn near committed suicide Saturday morning, over all this stress, started by Beaver Dick and his friend, that also brought on the landlord of the shop, which moved the move out even more so, so why even care? Just drink myself stupid, have sex with who and when I want, and just be selfish. Not care about no more Church crap, or a Ward that don't care even enough to send even my home teachers, the list goes on. So I just trashed the list. 
I'm going to live and heal, and if all goes right I'll be back home near Hazzard by November, this year. Why freeze when I don't have to?
TTYLY